Home > Eidsvoll, Misc > Sorry, I'm still here…

Sorry, I'm still here…

Hi,

Life moves on, every second, every minute, every hour and so on – life continues for ever it seems.

Which I guess is good. LOL

It is funny, strange, how things goes, I’m still stuck in Norway, for good it seems.

Last time I wrote I knew we where in trouble, but now I really know it as we are flat broke.

After years of nagging and pushing I was finally able to get Tore to understand that this nailing of him to the wall was for the benefit of our both – and he finally gave me the numbers that relates to our monthly expenses…

What a downer that was – I knew we had trouble, but the numbers where much higher then I had imagined, this can not last.

So, as Easter is passing by, and I have some work doing carpentry on the house here in Eidsvoll, it also means we are nearing next week and normal life again, with bills and other stuff to keep in mind.
And, of course, no work up here at the cabin.

Meaning, I guess we end up arguing again, as life catches up with us again…

I’m sick and tired of this stuff, I’m mad at my self for not pinning Tore to the wall years ago, and even more mad at him for not being able to control the money & expanses – and for not being a man I can trust.
I feel let down, betrayed and lied to – and I so want him to pay for it!

But, I also love him, and want the best in life for him – so it is a constant conflict within me, eating away my sanity each second, minute, hour, day, week, month… 😦

Not sure how to move on, I don’t feel I’m able to survive this much longer, and I have nothing left of my energy or any way to regain my self.
I’ve lost my home, we still own it, but I will never get back to the house in the Netherlands and the life I had grown to feel comfortable with. I’m feeling left alone out in the cold, and with no place to go, no place to feel home, no place to re-energy my self.

There are light points along the way though, and I do sometimes get a good feel over me – it just don’t last very long.

As long as I’m able to occupy my brain/mind with work on the new house, I feel happy and able to survive one more day – but like now, at evening I just feel so empty.

How will it end, who knows, all I know is that I have a dinner I need to go check on. 🙂

So, bye for now, who knows, maybe next time/month, year I have some good news to share to the world/who ever reads this stuff. 😉

Best wishes

Linda

Categories: Eidsvoll, Misc
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